I don't want Noah to go to school because I don't want other kids being mean to him. Once, at a kiddies park, Noah went to sit next to 2 other kids playing in a sandpit. This one kid picked up a spade of sand, and emptied it on Noah's head. He looked so sad, didn't do or say anything. Just slowly got up (didn't even brush the sand off in front of the kids) and walked away. It really hurt me, seeing him hurt.
I could have kicked that kid or given his mother a mouthful about raising children. But Noah took my hand and we walked away and got him an ice cream.
What if that or worse happens when he goes to school? What if someone shouts at him? Or hurts him? What if he hurts himself and cries and I'm not there to make it better?
But can I keep him at home forever? I really wish. I do.
He is so sheltered here. But his birthday party is next month and I have no kiddie friends to invite for him. He is having a kiddies party with a bunch of adults. Is that OK? They are adults who love and adore him. We will even (gladly) jump on the jumping castle with him.
Benjamin. A time is going to come, soon, when he is exposed to other people. I am having a seriously hard time with this. I am super protective over him. I don't let the nanny and hardly let Graeme hold or play with him. He is mine. And I want it to stay that way forever. There are other people that I trust with him, but what if they take him to a braai or some social gathering and there are a dozen people holding and playing with him? What then? I am freaking out inside over this. What if some other girl puts my bunny to bed? I don't want strangers, people that I don't know or trust, holding and playing with the bunny or "taking my place". I really just don't.
It feels like I'm about to lose my boys both in some way and I'm sad and scared and anxious. And I don't know what to do and I can't stop it, it feels like it's too late.
I agree so instinctively and wholeheartedly with that feeling of wanting to protect your child from the little fockers out there. Sometimes, you yourself are the focker. Just yesterday I told Felix not to throw his helicopter because it could break. In a kind, gentle voice! He started crying - huge crocodile tears running down his face in shame and embarrassment from the reprimand. Argh!
ReplyDeleteHis Paediatrician said that kids should only really go to school once they are 3. I take him to kiddie play parks (Bambanani in JHB) to interact with kids but all the kids seem to be ignoring each other and are on their own mission anyway? I wonder if he can stay at home another year? Benjamin should be interacting with him more by the time he is 6 months? Or am I being a kak mother depriving my child of a social life?
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